Dream A Little Dream…

Dream a little dream

Cinderella had them, The Little Mermaid had them, and so did every other princess in the history of princesses. They all, despite their flaws and setbacks, were courageous enough to dream. If a fairytale character made up of pastel colors and damsel in distress syndrome can do it, so can you. I dare you to dream a little dream…

Somewhere between being a little girl playing dress up in our mother’s high heals and being the bill paying adult, a little bit of the magic got lost. The world around us lost some of the wondrous amazement that kept us up as children, wondering about the stars and the creatures that go bump in the night. With the magic drained, we sometimes forget the beauty in a color packed sunset and the faith held within our deepest dreams. Dreams, the little butterflies that fly around our heart lifting us up into a place of hope and faith. A dream is a wish your heart makes….

What does your heart want? Yes the day to day can sometimes serve as a distraction, but underneath all of the ho hum, is the familiar flutter of your dreams. Forget about the bills, the deadlines, and what’s for dinner. For just a moment think about the dreams for your life. What makes your heart go pitter patter in a silly way? What image in your mind brings a lopsided 3 year old smile to your perfectly glossed lips?

Those dreams aren’t just child’s play, they are the building blocks of our future. Dreams serve to navigate us along the waters of happiness and energy. They help to remind us that even in moments of darkness, there is still light shinning from within us. Dreams complete the core of our beings, tied together with morals and substance. We are all at our center, dreamers. Dreamers, go getters, laughers, dancers, hardworkers…. we are all so very unique… but in so many regards we are all the same. We all just want to be happy.

What do your dreams say to you? Do you long for a lake to paint by or a corner office with an assistant named Jeeves? Embrace these dreams and use them as your map. You may not have exactly what your dreams blueprints require, but live your life piecing together that blueprint. It takes one spark, one line, one piece to get started. Don’t bottle your dreams up and put them on a shelf to be forgotten. Open them up and allow them to take form one magical moment at a time. Don’t expect instant gratification, I’m not selling you “Insta-Dream” just add water and stir…..poof dream realization. Enjoy the journey, live your dreams, share your warmth. If you’re willing to open up to your dreams, you dreams will be able to open up to you.

I want to encourage you to keep little notes, sketches, pictures, however your brain works, of your dreams. Maybe you long to own a house with stables, so you use EverNote to compile the perfect horse stables. Perhaps start a collection of recipes for when you open your cafe. Set aside even $1 dollar a day for your dream vacation to Ireland. Every step, every moment, will bring you one step closer to realizing your dreams. You can have whatever your heart desires if you are truly willing to embrace and move towards that dream. Dreams aren’t handed to us with a brightly colored bow, they are embraced and worked towards. The great thing is, when it comes to dreams, the “work” part is half the fun.

I would love to know what some of your dreams are, share in the comments.

As always until next time….

Keep it Sassy & Classy,

B's Sig

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You Are What You Think

I’m sitting in my office staring out into a chilly, but beautifully sunshiny day. I could focus on the windchill or I could focus on the brilliant blue sky and bright ball of glowing sunshine. You see, this is a choice each of us are faced with each and every day. Is it windchill you focus on or the brilliant blue?

Life has a funny way of forcing us to look at each moment with either rose colored glasses or dark and stormy thunder clouds. What I feel we most often forget is, life is truly created by the choices we make. We are how we think. If you allow dark and stormy to rain on the parade of thoughts within you head, the world around you will have the same ongoing downpour. However, if you opt to imagine the world as a brilliant sparkling diamond, the world around you becomes a fantastic glimmer of light and warmth. The brilliant thing about light and dark, is that we all posses the choice. The choice to decide on the world we live in.

Truth be told no matter how much you try, you will never be able to control anything outside of yourself. You can’t micromanage others into the perfect happy bubble. Just like you can’t live a life of dancing and laughter if you brain is consumed with negative thinking vomit. That’s exactly what negative and controlling thoughts are, vomit. Vile acidy tidbits of nothing that seep through our thoughts tarnishing the good and corroding everything into a giant melting pot of upheaval. If you take away nothing else from this blogvice remember this, negative breeds negative and positive breeds positive. You’ve heard the saying, you are what you eat, I say… you are exactly what you think.

The bad, goodness knows that negative thought fairy is all around. Your car gets a flat tire, you get laid-off, your niece spills fruit punch down your favorite sweater, or your ManFriend is watching ‘Revenge of the Nerds’ for the 1,928 time this week. The negative fairy dancing on your shoulder is going to tell you that your day is destroyed because of that stupid flat tire. She’s going to tell you that you’re an ultimate failure because your boss let you go and not the nitwit three cubicles down. She’ll say that children are the spawns of satan because not even dry-cleaning will knock out that juice stain. She might even get your annoyed to the point of picking a fight with your ManFriend for having the nerve to mellow out and watch the same movie AGAIN. In short…. Negative Nancy Fairy is a twit who starts drama, kick her little fairy butt to the curb.

Now Penelope the Positive  Thought Fairy is a sassy diva. She’s all smiles and flies around trying to catch your eye with her sparkle, so that you ignore that other fairy. Penelope the Positive Thought Fairy leaves a trail of warmth and sparkle in her wake. She sees the flat tire as an opportunity to push up those sleeves and take charge or as a great reason to see ManFriend again before the work day begins. Flat tire + One more good morning kiss = perfection. She’ll remind you that a layoff is a brilliant opportunity to stretch your legs and see what other adventures are out there for you. She helps you see your niece as beautiful and amazing. She’s not perfect… but your life is truly a better place with her in it. You can buy a new sweater, but little kiddos are priceless. She will show you that ManFriend treats you well and bless his heart he likes to watch the same thing over again, what a perfect time to curl up with him and recite your favorite parts. In short, Penelope the Positive Fairy is your BFF, hold onto this one, she’s a keeper.

The truth is negativity weighs us down. It invades our thoughts forcing us to live in the past or the future. By doing this we aren’t enjoying what is happening right before our eyes. Worry, negativity, doubt, fear… they are all simply distractions. Distractions that you can choose to ignore. Sure it may sound like a daunting task, but truth be told it is really an exiting adventure. A way for you to live your life like a dance party instead of like a never ending lecture.  The choice is yours, shall you dance or shall you sit in a lecture of worry?

You are the queen of your thoughts, you direct your attention… so choose to focus on the amazing. It is a beautiful day outside, the sun in shining and the sky is a spectacular shade of blue. Find the good, forget the bad. Remember, our world is created by our thoughts, and our thoughts dictate our actions. Everything around you has good within it, look for it. Fill your head with so much love and positivity that you walk on cloud 9 each and everyday. If you feel a negative though creep into your mind, quickly replace it with something brilliant. Would you rather worry yourself into frown lines or tone that butt by dancing and your abs by laughing? Replace no no thoughts, with anything warm and fuzzy. Tell yourself you are amazing, remind yourself of a kind act you completed, laugh because laughter feeds the soul. You are the author of your story, create words that inspire not only others, but yourself. Be your biggest inspiration… and that begins with finding the good and positive in even the most trying situations.

Create the world your heart desires.

As always, until next time…

Keep it Sassy & Classy,

B's Sig

 

Almost 30 Life Crisis: Your First Time

When is the last time you did something for the first time?

I read this question last night and it totally stumped me… the last time I did something for the first time was…. Scratch head… um… I can’t tell you. I live in a bit of a boring world of routine. You can pretty much set your watch (do people still wear watches?) to what I’m doing and when. I consider it reliable, grounded and expected. Routine, that’s what adults do. We are responsible and predictable and… oh my gosh I’m so boring. When did I trade in fun and exciting for boring and repetitive?

I love the people in my life. I’m dating an amazing man who has a fantastic daughter, I have wonderful friends and a little boy that amazes me every single day. Life is good, but I’m in a bit of a rut. I’ve become an old fuddy duddy. You may as well heat up a TV dinner, serve it to me on a TV tray, sit me in front of Wheel of Fortune and then push me off to bed before the clock strikes 7. I’m 29 going on 90.

It’s time for some revamp… the question is, when is the last time you did something for the first time?

 

How many more firsts can I squeeze into a day, a week, a month? Heck how many more firsts can I have in the next hour? You know that feeling when you heart rate picks up, you’re all smiles and you can sit still you are so giddy? I encourage you all to embrace your inner giddy, squeeze as many firsts and exciting things into every moment as you can. We can do the boring ole big kid stuff while having a total blast. Growing up doesn’t mean giving up our ability to have fun while doing it.

 

As always until next time…

Keep it Sassy & Classy,

B's Sig

Life Lesson Learned From the Pizza Guy

First and probably most importantly, pizza is freaking delicious. Second hamburger and black olives were born to be together and make lots and lots of pizza babies. That is one of the major contributing factors to my jeans fitting a little bit to snugly. Pizza and Mexican food….why couldn’t I have been blessed with a salad obsession. Sigh, anyway moving on….

So last night my favorite 7 year old gal pal and I had a girls night in. With the men folk out doing man folk things we had full control of the remote…. Winning. Since I am mildly phobic of germs and with flu season in full up swing, we opted to take advantage of some much needed couch time. So I ordered pizza and fired up the good ole Netflix machine.

An hour later there is a knock at the door. I answer wearing yoga pants, teal cami, and gray boyfriend sweater. Truth be told, not my hottest moment, but very very comfy. Comfy is my best friend this winter, I will worry about shaved legs and bikini bottoms in 6 months. So for now, bring on wool socks and yoga tights.

(This may be how I imagined the event below unfolding.)

I open the door to an awkward cold looking pizza guy (writers imagination cast Channing Tatum in the role of the pizza guy), his jaw drops to the snowy porch. “Woah you’re gorgeous,” he says reaching out the receipt for me to sign. I smile sign the slip and thank the nice man, pizza and flattery what great service. He replies, “No thank you, you’re smile made my night.” I was both flattered and inspired by my favorite pizza delivery guy ever. Compliments… Where have they gone?

We’ve become a society of judgy faces. “Look at that girl wearing those pants…omg.” “I can’t believe that guys said that.” “Ugh, did you see that, judgy judgy judgy face!” How fun is this? Let me answer for you, it’s not. Judgy face does not a friend make….but compliments can easily make someone’s year. Seriously, think about.

When is the last time you gave someone a compliment? Next question on our compliment quiz, when’s the last time you gave a stranger a compliment? We’ve developed such a critical eye towards ourselves and others, I feel like we are missing the little things in life. It takes about 2 seconds to tell a stranger, “Great shoes.” How about even a simple, “Thanks so much I really appreciate it,” when someone holds the door for you. It’s not hard, it’s rather easy. Say nice things or smile, you never know what kind of day someone else is having.

That brings me to my next point, you never truly know what is going on in the lives of those around you. That crabby lady that you mumbled under your breath about, maybe her dog died. The screaming kid in the grocery cart that forced you to avoid the cereal isle, maybe he has a double ear infection. The cashier who didn’t talk to you during your checkout time, maybe she’s fighting with her father. You never know, so aim to brighten up the day of those around you. Smile, give compliments freely, and try to keep the judgy face to a minimum.

I could easily pass judgment on someone, that takes little to no effort, but compliments take a little courage. Random acts of kindness people, if I can do it being a bit bashful, so can you. Today I encourage you to give one random person you don’t know a compliment. Just one simple, “hey you’re awesome”, sort of comment to a complete stranger. Then carry this mission with you home or when you go out with friends this weekend. Tell those you love how much they mean to you or how great they look. Spread the love and leave your judgy face for another day.

You mission if you choose to except it, spread a little warm and fuzzy this weekend.

As always until next time,

Keep it Sassy & Classy,

Almost 30 Life Crisis

And blog hiatus… End scene.

From my beautiful part of the world to yours, Happy New Year! I know I’m a little behind, but better late than never I always say. At least I say that whenever I forget something of importance. I promise I have a good reason for going awol. Maybe you can relate.

I can sheepishly admit that I am timidly knock knock knocking at 30s door. About this time next month I will be leaving the feisty world of my 20s and stepping into the unknown world of my 30s. To say I’m terrified and a bit sick to my stomach would be an extreme understatement. This “Almost 30 Life Crisis” caused me to spend the last couple of weeks looking, relooking, and looking yet again at my life.

Oh my gosh… Now what do I do?

Just me? It can’t just be me standing in front of a mirror with a major life milestone looming ahead with a look of sheer terror on her face. I’m not alone in this, how have I spent my last almost 30 years and what do I want to do with my next 30 year moment am I? Seriously someone say they are or have been in this position before or I might just cry into my coffee… Yes coffee at 1:15pm, that should tell you the kind of day I’m having. Coffee….coffee….coffee….

I remember thinking 30 was ancient, saying things like, “When I’m old, you know like 30, I’m going to blah blah blah.” I wish I had a time machine to go back to that clueless 15 year old and smack her upside the head. I can say that “young” little girl I once was has spent her time up to now living a scared life. I follow the straight and narrow, never venturing off the sidewalk, because I don’t want to risk getting hurt. I live a life surrounded by mile high walls that even prince charming himself couldn’t climb. These 29 years have been spent running around like Chicken Little…. The sky is falling… The sky is falling…run for your lives.

Upon reflection, I’m tired of the feathers, I’m ready to strut my stuff. It surprises me how easily I can admit that I’m clueless at 29. I could let that scare me, or I can grasp this opportunity to reinvent myself. Isn’t that what life is about, reinvention, making things new again? I don’t think age determines reinvention, reinvesting, or recommitting.

Reinvention: You, like me, are a work in progress… Never ever make apologies for that. If you still have a breath in your chest and thump in your heart, you can change. If you were blessed enough to wake up this morning, you have the strength inside you to make a new difference in your life and the lives of those around you. Don’t wait, look within your heart and find out what sets your soul on fire. Reinvent the old into something new and wondrous. You are never trapped, you have the freedom to be exactly who you create.

Reinvesting: Invest in yourself again. You are a hot commodity and you above everyone else needs to know that. Take time for you, even if only a few moments a day. Workout, meditate, paint, cook, write, dance, sing off key… I don’t care what you do, but do something each day for just yourself. If you love to take long showers, embrace the high water bill and become a mermaid. If you like to shake your groove thing in the kitchen download some new recipes. Whatever it is that you like to do, do it for YOU. If you aren’t investing in yourself, you won’t be able to invest in others.

Recommit: Commit to loving yourself and those around you to the fullest every single day. Each day, each second, is such a blessing. Love yourself for the amazing traits and for the works in progress. Forgive yourself of past mistakes and become excited for the moment you are living. Free yourself from OCD stressful planning, and leave a little bit open to the imagination. Love those around you with your entire heart and remember to forgive easily. Lashing out at people you car about only isolates those we love from one another. Embrace the unique differences we all have and treasure those moments. Laugh with each other, support one another, and again most importantly forgive one another. Together, don’t sweat the small stuff. Life has a funny way of working out when we stop trying to make it work out.

So, I guess… Welcome to my almost 30 life crises. It’s nice to have you along for the ride.

As always until next time,

Keep it Sassy & Classy,

B's Sig

Say What You Need to Say

Hello gorgeous, always fabulous to see you. I had an “Ah Hah” moment over the weekend that I’m super excited (perhaps a little nervous) to share with you. This moment involved putting on my big girl panties, telling the scared little girl inside of me to be quiet for a second, and taking advice from an always wise ManFriend. This weekend I faced a fear over five years in the making.

Let’s get a little back story… Yeah!… Story time…

Over 5 years ago I went through some major life changes. In the matter of about a year life hauled off and sucker punched me right in the kisser. WHAM! I should have seen it coming, but I was too busy blinding myself to see it. It’s really hard to see a big fat knuckle sandwich when you choose to skip along with your eyes closed, fingers in your ears, and a loud “lalalala” coming from your lips. Truth is, that WHAMY, it wasn’t so much life…. It was me. I kicked my world into a spiral of bad decisions and youthful ignorance.

The first step to fixing a problem is first admitting you have a problem. You see, I didn’t acknowledge this fact until I was already flying head first down a slide soaped up with Mr. Bubbles. By the time I’d realized I was hurting myself and those around me… I was alone. I woke up one morning, picked up the phone, and realized I had no one to call. I had successfully isolated myself from everyone with my hurtful behavior and childish actions. To put it bluntly, my life sucked.

The worst of it was losing my best-friend of nearly 20 years. She’d stood by me through the loss of my father, too many bad decision to count, heartbreak, joy… All of it. She was the closest thing to family I had growing up, she and her family were amazing to me. Even she had had enough of me. The ugly person I’d chosen to act like forced to her utter the phrase, “B, my life is better off without you in it.” To say I was crushed, would be the understatement of the century.

A few months passed and I realized I was a total moron. I apologized, but it wasn’t enough. I had hurt people too badly. I vowed at that moment to never ever make those foolish selfish mistakes again. I’m proud to say that though I’m far from perfect, those mistakes, they aren’t even an option for me anymore. On and off through the last 5 years I’d tried to reach out to my former best-friend and received little to no response. Couldn’t blame her, I’d pushed everyone too far.

This past October I sent her a message on Facebook (oh the joys of social media) simply asking how to she was. No response. It hurt, but it wasn’t exactly unexpected. I pushed it out of my mind and focused my thoughts on positive energy. Over this past weekend we were at a museum out of town in a crowded elevator, my mind going a mile a second making sure everyone was accounted for, when a very familiar voice said… “Hello B.” I look up to see the face of that best-friend that I had missed so much for so long. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to laugh, cry, or be angry. My insides were twisted and in an instant the exchange was over.

My mood changed. I was grouchy. I really needed time to be alone and reflect, but family time doesn’t always allow for space. When alone in the car with ManFriend I cried, actual head in my hand ugly face sobbed. ManFriend, drove in silence, smart to let me get it out and when I finally stopped crying he said. “B, this is your choice… But it seems to me that you love her and miss her. Tell her that.”

That’s probably the best piece of advice I’ve received in a long time. ManFriend and I talked for 2 days about me contacting her. Scared, doesn’t cover what I felt at the thought of getting rejected again. It’s hard, so hard, to put yourself out there to possibly get rejected. No one wants to get shot down or hurt…but you never know what will happen until you lay it all out on the line.

My former best-friend and I have since exchanged a few causal Facebook messages and have even become “friends” on Facebook. I’m thankful for even that small step. I’m not sure if we can ever be friends again, but with at least having the door to a friendship unlocked I feel like a little hole in my heart has been filled.

I want to encourage everyone to say what you need to say. Don’t be afraid to get hurt, because no matter the outcome you will learn something. You deserve all the happiness in the world, which you may miss out on if you are too much of a Chicken Little to go out there and get what you want. Do it today: send that email or write that letter. Pick up the phone and make a phone call that is long overdue. Go live your life without fear.

 

 

I’m sure glad that I took a chance…I bet you will be too.

 

As always, until next time….

 

Keep it Sassy & Classy,

B's Sig

If You’re Happy And You Know It

I would like everyone to raise their glasses, mugs, wine glasses, milk cartons, pints, whatever you have to SECOND CHANCES. I stand…. Er… sit before you a woman on a new found mission to make changes to help bring about B 2.0.

Let’s talk about our ATTITUDE people, what type of person are you?

The ho hum thanks for noticing me and the giant black cumulonimbus cloud floating above my head pelting me in the eye with hail and rain.  A.K.A “The Debbie Downer”

OR

The it’s my way or no way, here is the plan, this is how we are going to do things, listen to me… yeah you listen to me. HEY HEY I’m in charge here. Control, control, control AHHHHHH! (Inset hair pulling out here.) A.K.A “The Control Freak”

OR

The Hi my name is…. Oh butterfly… that’s shinny…..I like chocolate….. dinner was yummy….BUNNY bouncy bouncy bouncy…. wait, what was I talking about? A.K.A “The Space Cadet”

OR Last But Not least …. Drum roll please

The what a beautiful sunshiny day, there isn’t a care in the world and everything is going my way. Whatever comes will come and I will continue to roll with the punches. Life is good, sunshine!  A.K.A “The Smiley”

So… which one or ones are you. Me? I’m The Control Freak with a sprinkling of The Debbie Downer and a dash of The Smiley…. Translation…. Not exactly the type of gal I want to be. SO, it’s time for a wee bit of reinventing.

Attitude truly does make all the difference in the world and I am living that right now. I’ve had a bit of a tude / control issue over the past few months and it’s getting me nowhere fast. So I started doing some soul searching, pulling way down deep into my toes. Then it hit me. It doesn’t matter if we are talking about a workout, dating, marriage, dealing with the kiddos, baking a cake or walking Fluffy, your attitude is such a vital determining factor. It is in fact what people remember about you…..think about that for a second.  How does your attitude impact those around you and the things you do?

If you wake up in the morning grouching, grump your entire way to the gym, kick the treadmill because IT made you trip over your own running shoes, snap at the customer service rep leaving the gym who wished you a good day, flipped off the old lady who was driving to slow in the fast lane AND yelled at your Boyfriend for breathing in the same room as you ALL before 8 am… what sort of day are you going to have? What sort of day are you encouraging other people to have?

First of all, you woke up. That is a fantastic start to any morning, I’ve never not woken up in the morning, but I would assume that would be a pretty big drag. So paint on your smile if you have to and get your bootie out in the world all happy like!

Second the gym is a chance to embrace the body you want and reach the goals you’ve set, this is time to fill your head with motivation. There isn’t room for Negative Nancy Talk here. Either pump yourself up with music and words OR recite every digit of pi (3.1415926535), NO MATTER WHAT do not allow yourself to be invaded by negativity. Aint nobody got time fo that….

Third, you tripped over your own feet klutz, you don’t have a broken leg so laugh it off and move on. Do you really think you are the ONLY person to trip on a treadmill? Um no! You’re probably also the only person who noticed. This is not a crisis; don’t allow little things to become the giant elephant in the room. It’s the ole mountain out of a mole hill adage.

Forth don’t allow your words or attitude to bring down anyone else, that poor customer service person didn’t deserve a verbal back hand. Smile be happy and leave a trail of smiles in your wake. How do you want people to remember you? The jerk or the fantastic fabulous awesome person…. It’s your choice.

Same goes for fifth, remember to respect your elders even if they are driving27 mph in the fast lane. Someone that age use to bake you sugar cookies and spoil you rotten, so let the 27 mph thing go. Would you want someone giving the bird to your grandma? Does flipping off that poor woman really “fix” anything? Nope, just makes you look like a creep. Don’t be that gal.

Sixth, last but not least, leave your poor boyfriend alone. Don’t allow him to be part of your war path; don’t ever have a war path. Remember that he chooses to be with you because he loves you, he didn’t sign up to be your doormat. So love him, praise him and show him you love him. If you don’t, I’m sure there are plenty of other ladies out there who would. Now that’s not to sound all cat fight girl on y’all, it’s a simple fact. If you don’t treat people well, they won’t want to be around you.

You are in the ultimate control of your attitude and the way you treat people. Be aware of your words and your body language. The last thing anyone wants to do is push away those they care about or make them feel like itty bitty mice. LEAVE SMILES IN YOUR WAKE, be a light that draws people in. I know for me, when I can make someone smile it makes me feel good as well. It makes me happy… speaking of happy…

Welcome to The Happypaloosa Project… I’m making the commitment to myself to live a more upbeat, encouraging, laid back and exciting life….free of excess worry and constricting over-thinking. Today I choose to take the steps to breathe fresh invigorating happiness into my life.

As always, until next time,

Keep it Sassy & Classy,

B's Sig